how my daughter has made me a calmer person

since I was born, I pretty much hit the ground running

with a pretty intense personality [sorry mom]

now being a type A kind of girl has its upsides

like graduating from college in three years and being in your career at twenty-two

but my whole life I have always felt like I am moving non-stop

I remember when on break from classes in college

or on summer break from teaching, and just being restless

not enough to do, and too much time, ha, those were the days

when I thought of myself pregnant, or as a mom, I pictured a very wound-up persona

reading every book on pregnancy and parenting on the planet

always worried about sleep schedules and current parenting practices

but something funny happened when I actually became pregnant with Everly

I had no interest in those books, I only read one, Your Best Birth

[which I highly suggest, but that probably will be another post all together]

and even though I had my fair share of nesting, it was by no way what 

I thought it was going to be like

[no, I wasn't cleaning out the fridge at 2am like I was told]

my Everly changed me before she was even born
now, I am by no way saying I am cool as a cucumber
but I just feel a new calm
if it takes us two hours to get ready and leave the house, so be it
if I only get one errand done in a day, well, that is a victory
masters homework will get done when it really needs to get done
when I wake up before the entire family, I can just lay there forever
and stare at my little family
before Everly, as soon as my eyes opened in the morning, I was OUT of bed, stat
but not now
so let's just say that motherhood changed me in a way I did not expect
and I kind of love it
and I have a feeling my blood pressure will thank me in the future
not to mention when raising a girl gets really fun, like the teenage years
well, hopefully I'll still have a little calm from my Everly to get me through